Dating for people with mental health problems
It feels dishonest not to mention certain things to someone you’re trying to seduce, in the way I would feel dishonest not mentioning that I had a child or was missing a nose.I mustered the courage to meet only one person from the dating site. It could have gone further, but I would look at him across the table and think, I'm afraid that if I meet someone I really like, I will let the whole story explode out of me before he's seen the better side, which is what I did last time. I would love to feel I could keep my mental illness under wraps until I was comfortable with someone, as if it were a hobby like collecting international Barbie dolls. Having a panic attack in front of someone unprepared is not great for building trust.I am getting ready to switch medications, which can be ugly. I've seen how my illness affects my loved ones, and as much as I long for marriage and children, I often think everyone might be better off if I moved to a secluded fjord in Iceland and just sent postcards. She's thoughtful and shy, eats regular meals and goes out with her friends, reads books and likes making things. But the mentally ill side of me, like the springy snakes you stuff inside a joke can of nuts, is going to burst forth with a vengeance at some point, and she is no joke.She is hateful and self-pitying, withdrawn, listless, angry.
I can't imagine anyone asking her out, let alone thinking she’d be a good mother to their children.I'm sure that self-help books are very helpful for some people, but I never make it much past the table of contents.I have seen dating websites for the mentally ill, and although I'm sure there is blessed relief in a partner who knows what you're going through from the get-go, I don’t think matching us up is a good idea. But when it comes to talking about potential partners, most people don’t mention how to approach dating and loving someone with mental illness. We've all heard (or have) horror stories about dating people who turned out a little "crazy." Maybe she moved from the "like" stage to the obsession stage too quickly, or maybe he reacted by burning your stuff when you ended things.